Finally...

I finally feel like I have a clear head and feel better about decisions I have made. I just hope that this all pans out. For now I have done my part, I will say a few prayers and let it take its course.

I am still not choosing to put my health first which is pretty ridiculous. I am trying now to figure out what stops me every time I start to do really well. So far I do not have any answers. I am sure a part of it is very simple...I LOVE the way food tastes. Especially food filled with sugar and fats. I wonder if sugar & fats could be considered a drug...because I am pretty sure I'm addicted ;)

I watched my dvr'd Biggest Loser and was just amazed at how much difference a 51 year old woman made in her life. I was also very distressed by the back story of how much influence there is within the mother-child relationship; and how my choices are going to have such a profound effect on B. I want him to be that kid who picks up a banana or apple or peach instead of a snickers. (even in my head I laugh at this...but I realize that's because it takes modeling for a child to learn these habits)

If I can really just sit down, go through a healthy recipe book and plan a few dinners maybe I can make it work. Left to my own devices it comes down to whatever is quick and easy. Well 9 times out of 10 quick and easy equals unhealthy and fattening.

I have gained back only 2 lbs but that is still 2 lbs that I do not need. I have to stop giving myself such a free pass with regards to 2 lbs. 2 lbs is HARD to lose. Therefore, I shouldn't make it so easy to regain.

I did take a mommy afternoon and enjoyed getting my hair done. I put in red highlights. They didn't come out exactly as I had planned but well they are getting a good reaction so I have decided just to roll with it :)